A Wedding Lasts a Day – A Marriage Lasts A Lifetime

One of the women who work in my office is going to get married in one week. Although she has not discussed the details of her wedding as much as other brides I have known in the past, I know that she has put many long hours in to ensure her wedding day is perfect.  So much time is spent by couples, especially brides, to plan and prepare for this special day. I do not blame them because your wedding day is a day that you will remember for the rest of your lives.

Although your wedding is a special day, it is important that remember that it is in fact only one day. A wedding lasts a day, but a marriage lasts a lifetime.  Why it then that so much time is spent planning this one day and often a minimal amount of time is spent preparing for marriage?

I felt that I was fortunate that my husband and I were required by our church to take a class on marriage and be mentored by a married couple prior to getting married. This process did open my eyes to what my world will become after the wedding day had passed. Even if my husband and I did participate in this marriage preparation process, I probably did not know enough, or do enough, to prepare myself to be married.

Because I was not prepared for marriage, after I was married I did a lot or growing (actually both my husband and I grew). During this period of growth, times did get somewhat turbulent because each spouse had to make accommodations for the other spouse.  Examples of the changes we had to make included changing our perspectives on life. We both had to convert to a “we” as opposed to “me” mindset. We also had to make compromises and sacrifices. We could not afford (or sometimes we did not have the time) to do things that we used to do when we were single.

I think that if I was a bit more knowledgeable prior to embarking on my journey as a married woman, the beginning of my marriage would have went a bit smoother. Change is usually accompanied by stress so a large amount of change can sometimes be extremely stressful. If I could give a piece of advice to engaged couples it would be to put as much (or more) time into preparing for married life as you put into preparing for your wedding day.

If a man has recently married, he must not be sent to war or have any other duty laid on him. For one year he is to be free to stay at home and bring happiness to the wife he has married (Deuteronomy 24:5).